This 6 weeks... Is gonna be one of the longest, hardest period of time I'm gonna go through.

It's too short for exams. Yet too long to go home. And God knows, I want to go home, see my family, resolve and work out issues with Cross, though the last one is probably up in the air for now.

Sigh. And I have a very strong feeling Cross misunderstood my words. AGAIN. And I want to just... Message him and clarify what I meant and all. And I had to keep telling myself "6 weeks. 6 weeks." And painfully put my phone back down.

I want to tell Cross all the silly things I learned about my classmates, and laugh with him (and at him). I want to gush over which Angels in the VS fashion show that I like. I want to whine to him when I'm tired of studying the same page for the past one hour. And every time I have those thoughts, every time I reach for that damn phone. I have to keep reminding myself of that 6 weeks.

Whatever Cross interpreted from my words, whatever girl he wants to see in those 6 weeks, whatever he wants to do, I will not bother him about it. He's free to do whatever he wants. I will not bind him to me anymore.

And who knows. He would probably find someone that can heal those wounds I cause. And maybe, I'll just be someone he thought he needed but actually didn't.

I don't know what's gonna happen during these 6 weeks. I don't know how much would have changed once I go back. I don't know how much of what Cross said that he wants to do with me would come true, or whether they would just remain as thoughts or wistful dreams.

I'm just gonna play a painful waiting game. And see what happens, what changes would occur, once it's over.

Maybe while waiting, I'll learn something too...

Back to the present?