Irrashaimasei~! My Never-Ending Story

What am I?

I am a head-turner.
I am angelic. I am innocent.
I am loud. I am simple.
I am possessive. I am obsessive.
I am different. I am special.
I am soft-hearted. I am a giver.

You shall be so fascinated
that you will wake up the next morning
and wonder if you have met God the night before.

Yes, you have.

Close

LOSE YOURSELF
in this wild mix of colours.

Speech Bubbles

Talk to me
I don't bite. Hard. ~_^

COS THAT'S THE ONLY WAY
that you will find laughter.

DANCE LIKE AN ELEPHANT
squeal like a pig.

All I Want

Alternate Realities.

My own house.

My own car.

More jigsaw puzzles to fix.

Fall in love.

Rule the World.

Burn School DOWN.

JUMP, SCREAM, WAVE
YOUR HANDS AROUND
as if you've just lost your mind.

Touch the Sky!

COS WE'RE GONNA
PAINT THE TOWN RED
and we're gonna do it tonight.

Quoting Anonymous

SO STOP YOUR COMPLAINTS
and join the chaos.

Who am I?

I am a student from NTU.
I am from Singapore.
I am 22.
I am a Gemini.
I am loved.
I am a Child of God.

I am Ketsurui.

Close

THERE WILL NEVER BE
another dimension like this.

What Hurts the Most

Thursday, December 06, 2012 4:36 pm

Now that my emotions have died down enough to be identifiable, I realise what hurt the most was not that Cross wanted me to drop TCM, nor was it how harsh he was... But because he said that I'm just treating him as some form of comfort or dog or doormat (whatever he said). That I'm using him. And... It felt like he was pushing me away...

It literally silenced off a part of me... And now that my head has cleared... It feels so quiet...

Heh... The part that was silenced... Was the part that wanted him the most... I guess it went into hiding or something... Probably because Cross wanted me gone... So... I don't know. And now... Well... Since that part is pre-dominantly the part that thinks of Cross the most, so yeah... It's like I don't know what to feel or think about him anymore...

I don't want Cross to think I'm using him... Cause I'm not. But since he thinks so... Then somewhere somehow, my thoughts and feelings are not conveyed through my actions... Or my feelings were a lie all along, and I no longer know what to do... Nor do I know what to feel...

Hell. I don't even know if Cross wants me by his side anymore... One moment he's pushing me away, the next he's happy that he's mine... And I'm so damn scared of doing or saying anything now cause I don't want him to push me away anymore...

Heh... Kyoya asked me that if one day if Cross really wants me gone or if he really pushes me away for good, can I let go?

To be honest, I don't know. I know I should. I do not want to tie Cross down to me if he doesn't want to be by my side. Yet... To let go... When it comes down to it... I don't know if I can...

I guess I'm just an idiot... Sigh...

The next time... If Cross wants out... Even if it kills me on the inside, I guess I have to learn to let go, don't I? No point trying to hold on when the other party wants to leave...

Back to the present?

LIVE IT UP
Suck it up dude.

JUST LOSE YOURSELF
to the beat, yeah yeah yeah.