To God,
One day, my praise will be like the best-tasting wine you have ever tasted. That's the kind of praise I want to offer to you. Although now, I'm still not good enough. I still get so easily swayed by my emotions, my state of mind, by other people, etc.
And let's be honest Lord, I suck as an evangelist. I still have no idea how to show how good You are in my life without being an annoyance to people. Or maybe I really just don't care. Either way, I suck as an evangelist.
So Lord, I pray You'll be patient with me. I still have so much I have to grow into. And I'm still so far from everything You want me to be. But I'll reach there one day. And I'll do my best to make You proud.
And though the future is kind uncertain now, with me going China and all, and personally, I actually have no idea what I'm going to do as a future career... I mean, I have ideas... But You tend to shoot all my ideas down the drain. Like that time in A Levels, when I told You I never want to take anything Chinese again, and guess where You place me.
I guess... This is something I have no idea how to tell people like Kyoya and Shell. How do I tell them I'm literally living based on faith. That I have no idea about my future, and that I'm putting my entire future in Your hands, and that I trust You will take care of things for me.
It's quite incomprehensible to the human mind. It's also sort of scary too.
But I know Lord, that I'm meant to be here in this crazy course with the subject I hate the most. I see You in here. Most people would say it's just coincidence that I get all that I pray for, but... How many coincidences would it take for it to become a miracle?
For me, there's way too much coincidences for me to consider anything else but You. And I guess, it's really because of You that I have a reason to smile and laugh everyday.
I thank You for the friends that You have given me. I know where I once was, and when I see where I am now, I really thank You. Although I had no idea how to be a friend or make one, yet You gave me Yuki, who is so like-minded as me that it's almost freaky. And You gave me Shell who supported me in the background when I was in JC.
And now in Uni, I have Kyoya. And Sexy. And suddenly, I seem to be making so many friends that I'm kinda amazed. And I would like to thank you, for putting all these people in my life. And allowing my path to cross with theirs.
And now, I just want to wish you Happy Valentine's Day! Although it's probably another day in time for You, and for me, it's just another day to have fun and mess around with people. But still. I still want to say that to You. However silly it may be.
Your Beloved