You know... Just on my last post, I was whining about how I couldn't watch "Despicable Me"? Well... After that, while I was asking J for some help about Google Docs, he asked if I was free for lunch and a movie. And guess what we watched? 8DDD "Despicable Me in 3D"!!! Whoo~!!! And the best part? We watched it during this afternoon, so my evening was free to attend my cell gathering!!

Coincidence? Or a simple miracle?? XD

And since my OG member had to book the tickets first, I sort of felt bad... So I offered to pay him back for my ticket. Then, during the cell gathering, I received an sms that said that my ticket was refunded by the cinema, so I need not pay him back. 8DDD Oh yeah~!

And I was supposed to give a talk on my experience in Melbourne for my JC, but it sort of clashes with my cell equipping workshop... Then I received news today that it was postponed to half an hour later. ^-^ So I actually have time for lunch and travelling. 8D

I wonder... How many coincidences will it take for one to concede that something, SOMEONE is at work out there??? ~_^

Haha! Anyway, somehow, things just got aligned for these 2 days. XD And I am really glad because for a moment, I have no idea how to figure things out. ^-^

Whew. And just for an update, the doctors in Aus believe that the arthritis in C is a symptom for something else, and gave her some antibiotics in hopes that it will help. And true enough, N received word from C that she's feeling better now. =^^=

Thank God for miracles... Be it big or small. Once-a-lifetime or everyday ones. ^-^

I have survived today. And I will survive tomorrow~!

Back to the present?

Today I went out with my mom. =^^= Haha! For ONCE, I actually found a dress that I like. XD I'm usually the jeans/pants sort of girl so while I do have a few skirts in my wardrobe, you'd be hard-pressed to get me to wear them. XP Even worse for dresses. I only have... 2 dresses for formal wear. And that's all. And now, I have a dress for casual wear. XD Took me forever to find one that actually suits me and I like it. XD

Actually... Most dresses suit me, cause I'm quite small-sized... >.> But I never quite liked those dresses... XD I blame my mom. Haha! I've never seen her in a dress before either. Hahaha! Ooo! I went to Uni Qlo today and bought a ONE PIECE T-SHIRT!!! Whoo~!!! It was EPIC! All the Strawhat crew was wearing mafia-like suits and they look soooo AWESOME!!! I had to buy it. =^^= You should have seen my mom's expression... ^^" Eh... Let's just say it ain't cheap... But it's ONE PIECE!!! So it's totally worth the price to me... XP

Ok. I'm obsessed.

And I finally found a pair of sneakers that I really liked too~! Yay!! Today was a really good day for shopping. ^-^ And shopping with my mom is always fun, cause both of our taste in clothes are quite similar. ^^" And my mom is real cute when she shops. XD She coos and goes all melty when she sees all those blouses with puff sleeves. Hahahaha! Then when she sees the prices, the sparkle in her eyes dies, and she whimpers sadly about it. Hahaha! She is a really fun person to shop with. ^-^

All in all, I spent most of my morning and afternoon out. By the time I came back, I was really tired... X( Being introverted means the longer you stay away from your house, the more energy is sucked out of you... =( So yeah... I'm a hermit.

Zzz... And there is sooo many things I wanna do on Friday but for some reason, everything occurs AT THE SAME TIME!!! So I can only choose one. Damn. Zzz. First there is cell gathering at around 6pm... I really REALLY want to skip it... But they're gonna discuss about cell RTC and I'm the programming IC and I CAN'T MISS IT. D<

Then my OG group is watching "Despicable Me in 3D" at 6.45pm and I WANT TO GO!!! But I can't because of the cell gathering.

Then there is DnD Alumni Dinner at 7+ pm which I can't go because I doubt the cell RTC discussion will end that quickly... Also my "wonderful" cell leader signed me up for some workshop that I personally think is useless, but she looked so happy about it I can't tell her that... =.= Zzz... Sometimes having a soft heart for females really sucks.

Sigh. Sometimes I wish I have Hogwarts' Time Turner. Then I can go watch the movie with my OG and go for the cell gathering at the same time. For the DnD Alumni Dinner... The only person I'm most comfortable to talk to is away in Cambodia for YEP so... I can leave that out...

And Saturday's gonna be packed as well... @_@ And I just realised that most of my weekends during August is gonna be filled with something... XD In a sense that's good... Now to figure out how to fill my weekdays... and still have time to nap in between. ^^" I still love sleeping after all...

Back to the present?

Zzz... Took me one night to properly process what I have to do... And I still don't think I got the full gist of it... But... Sigh... I guess I just have to take on this duty and see where it leads me...

Last evening, I met P and N for a talk of some sort... Namely, them talking to me. ^^" They said that I've been growing a lot, in faith and sensitivity... Zzz... Personally, I don't see it. But then again... Unless I am very faithful and very sensitive to others (which I'm not), I probably won't see any growth... At least from my own point of view. Honestly speaking, both of them left me quite dumbfounded. XD I doubt I will ever get used to compliments... Unless they're of a joking nature. But I could tell from the look in their eyes, they really meant what they say. And I guess... That the confounding part of it all...

Basically, what P and N wants is for me to fully take on the role of a cell administrator and handle all the admin work from both leaders. O.o I was too stunned to ask "Why me". Anyway, one of the reasons why they're doing this is because P may be moving on to work in the church full-time, and she's leaving most of the operational stuff of the cell to me. The pastoral parts will be handled by N, although I will be bearing some of his load as well.

That's because N has... some issues he needs to attend to in Aus. And for the time being, most of the workload is being handled off to me and P. As tedious as it may be... At this moment, I really don't want to burden N too much with such things... I think... He has enough on his plate for now... Just by meeting him, seeing that look in his eyes... Just made my heart reach out for him... X(

It's like watching his world shatter in front of him... And yet, he's still trying to hold everything together. And my heart feels heavy... Watching him struggle like that... That look in his eyes... I never want to see it in anyone ever... Zzz... Damn. I really dislike being empathic towards other people's feelings. And yet... What I feel for them is only probably a fraction of what they are actually feeling themselves. And personally, I myself cannot even begin to fathom the hell he is going through.

So at very least... If me taking up these responsibilities will allow him some respite, then, what the hell, I'll bear with it.

Long story short (from what N said), C, N's gf, is down with arthritis. She's in constant pain, and no science or medication can ever cure her, at least not for now. She's struggling to take her exams, which involve lots of writing, with her swollen fingers. And... Zzz... It's like watching someone with cancer, except you can't use any form of medication with the hope of curing it. There is no cure. At least for cancer, you can cut it away, or use chemo, or even die. But... Arthritis... Is not so deadly... She'll most likely live with this pain for the rest of her life.

And... I've met C before. She's a really beautiful girl with lots of ambitions and she's always full of smiles... And for something like that to happen to her... I cannot say I understand her pain... But what I do understand, is that pain in N's eyes as he talked about it. That painful realisation that... There's not much to hope for when it comes to curing her. And... My heart just really went out to them...

Sigh... I really REALLY dislike being emotional. But... I can't hear all of this and not care... Not when I can see their struggling and when I can see their pain. Sigh...

Then there's the issue of Ivan and F. Zzz... That blockhead wants to break up with F cause he can't see a future for them. Personally, if you're gonna break up with someone, at least do it with a better reason that "I'm going to jail, so I can't provide for you in the future". Zzz. This one... I cannot help them... It's not my relationship. It's not my decision to make. It's not my future. I can't decide for F, nor can I decide for Ivan. Sadly, I actually understand both of them... But... Even if I want to, I can't force them apart or force them to stay together. Zzz... Ah hell... Just need to make sure my home door is always open to both of them... Ivan may not visit, but F will. Especially if she needs to get away for a while.

Sigh... Since when does one night result in a whole catastrophe of disasters...?

Back to the present?

=333 PoT fandom~!!! Haha! When Inume visited yesterday, I am reminded that I have yet to watch PoT episodes. XD So today, I decided to go online to search for them to watch. XD Yes. I don't like watching anime but I can make exceptions... I just take a long LONG time to actually sit down and watch them.

OMG. I am re-discovering my love for PoT. ♥♥♥ Hahaha! Ryoma is as AWESOME as ever~♥!! Though I much prefer the Tezuka from the manga compared to the anime. ^^" After all, I did fall in love with the one from the manga and I'm a biased person. XP

But seriously, watching Ryoma play tennis is like injecting heroin into my bloodstream. XD I get really high watching him play. That look in his eyes!! ♥♥ Haha! OMG. I really sound like a RFG (rabid fan girl). XD

It took me a hell long while to realise why I love PoT so much. ^^" Actually, it took the 100 truths on FB to make me realise, even though I read PoT a long time ago... Like during sec sch. ^^" The reason is actually quite simple: Forearms.

^^" Yes. I think guys with nicely muscular forearms are damn hot. ^^" Maybe that's why I also like to watch some guys play the guitar... >.> And... PoT mangaka just so happens to draw the PoT crew with really nice forearms... ♥♥♥ =^^= So they'll be my eye candy for the next few days. XD Hahahaha!

The few guys that I know that has damn nice forearms in my life are N and WR from cell. =^^= They're both attached though. So I shall not linger on them. Another guy I know is D, Sam's friend. He's a really awesome guy who can use sign language really well and his forearms are ♥♥♥. XD It feels really weird to gush about your brother's friend, so I shall move on... >.>

I don't remember if any of the cheerleading guys have nice forearms... Except for Ja. Cause when he lifts me, there is a certain feeling of strength from his arms when I grip them. =^^= It's a really nice, secure feeling. For the rest of the guys... =X I only remember that I'm terrified of falling. ^^" Oops.

Okok. Enough talk. Back to watching my beloved PoT~♥♥♥!!! Ku-chan~♥ Wait for me!!

Back to the present?

I had the oddest of dreams a couple of nights ago.

I'm not sure about the details... After I woke up, the information became kinda sketchy. But what I did remember was that it involved some sort of lesson. The dream was something like Inception. I was supposed to fall into some dream-like state and complete certain quests. Me, being the beginner, had no idea what I had to do and end up losing to the first boss. XD

I remembered it was like a dungeon-like setting, and our minds are connected to something that looks like a computer. XD It's like some crossover between Inception and the Matrix. >.< I remembered that I met some of my friends along the way too... But I can't quite remember them, except they are female.

It is an odd feeling, to wake up from being killed, only to realise it was a dream, and that reality was, in essence, a dream in itself. Zzz. Makes me wonder if the reality we're in is really reality or just another dream...

Makes me think about a story I heard somewhere once... I believe it's from xxxHolic: A man once had a dream about being a butterfly. And when he had woken up, he wondered if he dreamt that he was a butterfly, or was he a butterfly dreaming about being a man.

To no longer be able to differentiate reality from dreams... I think that's a scary thing... For me... I am actually aware of that fine line that divides dreams and reality. I just much prefer to live in dreams. Reality can be a bitch sometimes. Dreams, however, are forever soft cushions to float on.

Unless you have a nightmare, of course...

Back to the present?

Back to the present?

Sigh... It's really hard... To see your grandfather... Someone who doesn't complain about anything, who smiles through everything, lying in the hospital bed, tubes sticking out of him, looking as if the life's been sapped out of him.

Two days ago, my grandpa's been complaining about an abdominal pain. The doctor he saw told him to go to the hospital. But the hospital staff could not find anything wrong with him. And he went home. The next day, the pain persisted. My dad got fed up and pulled a few strings so that my grandpa gets the proper diagnosis this time. XD Doesn't hurt that my grandpa is the brother of one of the hospital's most renowned professors. Anyway, that professor quickly gave a few names of doctors to see my grandpa and diagnose the problem. Apparently, his intestines are blocked. Hence, he couldn't eat since yesterday. And as far as I know, they've been draining away anything and everything in his stomach.

And now... He has to undergo surgery to remove whatever that is blocking his intestines. Sigh... My grandpa is a fighter. He fought off cancer twice already, and now, he's fighting this...

The most heart-aching part was seeing my grandma cry... I dunno... But whenever I see a girl cry or get scared, I get all soft-hearted and stuff... I keep trying to make her laugh... But I can't erase the fact that, one day, my grandma will be alone. Maybe not now... But eventually... And she can't stand that thought... Of being without my grandpa. After all, he has been her pillar of support and strength for over 50 years. He is always there looking after her in his own silent way. He means the world to her. And she cannot live without him.

And no matter how I try, I know that I can never console her on this. My grandpa is already over 70 years old. Even if modern surgery minimises all sort of risks, there will always be a risk of my grandpa dying in the surgery room. Especially since he is already so old...

And that silly old man is still more concerned about my grandma than himself. XD

Sometimes, I envy them. And I do wonder... Will I ever find someone that I cannot live without? Haha. To me, it's a scary notion... To be so dependent on someone... But then again... It is only then I truly see what love is.

It's really sticking by someone through thick and thin. To be that pillar of support and strength to that someone. To fight, make up and laugh it off. And to hold that person's hand, with tears in your eyes, and never let go.

And I am jealous. Really. When I watch them love each other, I am jealous of what they have.

And being the eldest and the only granddaughter, I have to be strong. When my grandpa is no by her side, I have to be strong from my grandma. Because, as of the moment, I'm the only one holding her upright. My dad, my uncles... They help, but the one she leans onto is me. And I have to be strong. So that I, too, can smile when my grandpa recovers.

My grandpa is a fighter. He'll be fine... And it is to these words, my hope clings on...

Back to the present?

A strangled smile fell from your face
It kills me that I hurt you this way
The worst part is that I didn't even know
Now there's a million reasons for you to go
But if you can find a reason to stay

I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know that I've let you down
And if you give me a chance
Believe that I can change
I'll keep us together whatever it takes

She said "If we're gonna make this work
You gotta let me inside even though it hurts
Don't hide the broken parts that I need to see"
She said "Like it or not it's the way it's gotta be
You gotta love yourself if you can ever love me"

I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know that I've let you down
And if you give me a chance
And give me a break
I'll keep us together, I know you deserve much better

But remember the time I told you the way that I felt
That I'd be lost without you and never find myself
Let's hold onto each other above everything else
Start over, start over

I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know I've let you down
And if you give me a chance
and believe that I can change
I'll keep us together whatever it takes

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

HURRY UP BACK YOU IDIOT!! I WANT TO WISH YOU WELCOME HOME!!!

Back to the present?

Tomodachi ni tegami wo kaku toki mitai ni
Surasura to kotoba ga dete kureba ii no ni
Mou sukoshi o-tagai wo shiriau ni wa jikan ga hoshii
Uragiranai no wa kazoku dake nante
Sabishisugiru yo Love is asking to be loved
Shinjiru koto wo yamete shimaeba raku ni natte wakaru kedo

Don't you see! Negatte mo inotte mo kiseki omoide
Sukoshi wa ki ni kakete
Don't you see! Chotto sameta furi wo suru kuse wa
Kizutsuku no ga kowai kara

TAXI noriba de matte 'ta toki no chinmoku wa
Tatta gofun na no ni
Mono sugoku nagaku kanjita
Muri wo shite tsukarete
Aozameta koi wa yokisenu dekigoto

Don't you see! Chiisana kenka de
Makezugiraina futari da kara hotto shita no
Don't you see! Ironna hito wo miru yori
Zutto onaji anata wo mite itai

Don't you see!
I'll never worry, tonight
I'll lay me down, tonight
You know, I do it for you

Don't you see! Umareta machi no nioi
Kurekakaru gairojuu wo futari arukeba
Don't you see! Sekai-juu mo dare mo ga donna ni isoide mo
Watashi wo tsukamaete ite

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This old song... For some reason... It speaks to me... "Even if I ask and pray for miracles and memories, I worry a little", "Even if I have a habit of pretending to be cold , I'm afraid to be hurt".

Sigh... I don't know anymore. At least... Now, the thoughts of you are more bearable... But I'll be lying if I say I stop liking you. Every now and then... Something... Anything, would remind me of you. And I've given up trying to stop it...

I doubt you think of me the same way. Heck... Sometimes... Even staying a friend to you is hard... And yet... Stupid little me keeps trying...

Sigh... To silly little you who is coming back from Swiss: I miss you.

Back to the present?

I don't tell anyone about the way you hold my hand
I don't tell anyone about the things that we have planned
I won't tell anybody
Won't tell anybody
They want to push me down
They want to see you fall (Down)

Won't tell anybody how you turn my world around
I won't tell anyone how your voice is my favourite sound
I won't tell anybody
Won't tell anybody
They want to see us fall
They want to see us fall

I don't need a parachute
Baby, if I've got you
Baby, if I've got you
I don't need a parachute
You're gonna catch me
You're gonna catch if I fall
Down, down, down

I don't need a parachute
Baby, if I've got you
Baby, if I've got you
I don't need a parachute
You're gonna catch me
You're gonna catch if I fall
Down, down, down

Don't believe the things you tell yourself so late night and
You are your own worst enemy
You'll never win the fight
Just hold on to me
I'll hold on to you
It's you and me up against the world
It's you and me....(Love)

I don't need a parachute
Baby, if I've got you
Baby, if I've got you
I don't need a parachute
You're gonna catch me
You're gonna catch if I fall
Down, down, down

I don't need a parachute
Baby, if I've got you
Baby, if I've got you
I don't need a parachute
You're gonna catch me
You're gonna catch if I fall
Down, down, down

I won't fall out of love
I won't fall out of,
I won't fall out of love
I won't fall out of,
I won't fall out of love
I won't fall out of,
I won't fall out of love
I'll fall into you

I won't fall out of love
I won't fall out of,
I won't fall out of love
I won't fall out of,
I won't fall out of love
I won't fall out of,
I won't fall out of love
I'll fall into you

I don't need a parachute
Baby, if I've got you
Baby, if I've got you
I don't need a parachute
You're gonna catch me
You're gonna catch if I fall
Down, down, down

I don't need a parachute
Baby, if I've got you
Baby, if I've got you
I don't need a parachute
You're gonna catch me
You're gonna catch if I fall
Down, down, down

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Haha! This song really reminds me of cheerleading... Of falling and catching... ^-^ And I remember the time YX told me to fall backwards, just so I can learn to get over my fear of falling... XD The hardest part... Wasn't just the falling... It was also trusting that he would catch me. I guess... The others don't quite realise it... But it took a lot from me... To learn to trust them... Especially YX. Zzz... I have issues. =.=

-----------------------------------------

Yesterday, since I spent whatever time I have typing out the camp, I didn't really write much about yesterday. XD The only eventful thing yesterday was choir. We may be going caroling for Christmas!! Whoo~! But it may clash with exams!!! D8 Aw... Haha! And now the tenors are separated into T1 and T2, with T1 to help out with the altos, since there are not enough of them. XD It seriously sound like Changi Airport. The Sops and I were laughing among ourselves and asking the guys when T3 will be ready. XD

For the Sops, I nicknamed as Esplanade. Haha! Since we are usually the ones singing all the high notes and the melodies. I haven't quite decide what to call the Altos yet. XD Though for some reason, I wanted to call them Expo. XD Hahaha!

------------------------------------------------------

Today... Zzz... Sian. I actually wanted to visit MGS, where the other cheerleading guys are training gymnastics. Just to watch them. XD But my parents insisted I watch Inception with them... X( By the time the show ended, I didn't have time to visit them anymore... D8 Aww... Zzz... I will visit them some other day then. XD

Inception is very nice. I liked the concept of dreams within dreams. And sometimes, I do wish we could just keep dreaming... To the point where reality and dreams no longer differentiate. That my dream world could be my reality and I would fall asleep to wake up. I think that is a very idealistic, but a very tempting notion...

Reality... Zzz... It's not like I have no idea what reality is like... But sometimes... When you look at reality and see all those black and white and all those lies in between... Sometimes, it's much saner to turn your back to the world and pretend they never existed. Eventually, I have to face them. Eventually, I have to deal with them. But for now, in school; in this enclosed society, I want to pretend they don't exist...

One day, I have to wake up... But until then... I'll just keep dreaming.

Back to the present?

My week at camp was fun!! Whee~ I love the freshies! They are really awesome~♥ Haha! Though BMS(I) says I act a lot like a freshie. XD Oops? Haha! But personally... I don't see it... =/ I mean... Technically, the only difference to me between a freshie and a senior is that a senior is older. And more knowledgeable... But I'm the blur sort, so... ^^" But all things considered, I really tried my best to look after the freshies as well as I knew how. It's... Well... I guess I'm still not really as good as people as the others... X( Zzz... I guess I really need to work on my communication... Anyway, back to camp:

The first day was really fun! We had day games and night games all around NTU. And there is SP pairing as well. XD It was also this day that I fell sick. X( Zzz. I guess friday's swimming got to me after all. XD I guess what stood out for that day for me was actually the SP pairing. Of course, no sec sch or JC will have such a crazy thing, and it was the first time I'm actually seeing it. Sadly, I'm not allowed to participate in it, as there is too many girls and too little guys. Though I really wonder what it is like to be blindfolded, paired off with some random stranger and be bothered by people with squeaky high voices. XD Though I found about the first and last one from Initiation. XD

Watching the whole thing is quite chaotic though. i really had no idea what to do or what to say. And by then, my throat was giving me quite a bit of problem and I can't quite manage the fake squeaky high voices the others were using. Though BMS(I) end up having an SP pairing and it was so amusing to watch him attempting to talk to the poor freshie. Hahaha! I think he'll have more lucky talking to a brick wall. XD She was sooo scared! Haha! Finally, we were allowed to go to the chalet to sleep. Though I didn't have much sleep. X( I guess being with unknown people for the first time tend to make me more alert and less sleepy... X( Though I paid for it on Tues.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next day (Tuesday), my sickness got worse. X( Really... When I close my eyes, I swore, the world was spinning. But it was supposed to be quite a fun day, so I just bore with it and tried my best to play as well. XD When the freshies were playing Cluedo, us seniors were told to go fill the water bombs for the wet games later. I filled the water bombs with BMS(I), Naf and some others. Now I know why BMS(I) likes Naf so much. She is really funny! And I only just realised yesterday the guy most of the others were teasing is the BS club president. XD OMG. I never even knew who he is. Haha! Throughout the camp, I only recognise him by his smile. XD He has a really nice smile. Haha!

When the wet games came though, I felt a little nauseous from all the spinning in my head, and by then, my head really felt quite heavy. I don't know if I had a fever, though I felt quite cold. X( Anyway, I spent most of the wet games time sleeping. Since I wasn't allowed (by BMS(I)) to help him, and i really doubt playing wet games would help my head, so I just sat by the bags and slept. By the end of wet games, I definitely felt better. XD I guess the illness got worse due to a lack of rest... >.> Oops.

After the wet games, we had Fright Night. XD I wanted to go... But same as SP, there is not enough guys so.. =/ Sigh. Anyway, I still had to go there anyway as I have to entertain the freshies that are waiting for their turn. XD OMG. I was sooo bored!! And I didn't really know how to talk to the freshies as well... =( Though I enjoyed listening to some of the freshies' ghost stories. XD I guess the best thing about the fright night was that I got to listen to quite a bit of stories. XD

By around 2+ am, some guy Z, came to sent another girl and me back to the chalet. I went back on orders of BMS(I). XD And of course, blur little me didn't know he was the chairperson of the FOC until the last day again. XD I only knew he is a really nice guy and he has really awesome specs. It's SILVER!! *coughandniceeyescough* Anyway, after I went back to wash up, I was knocked out until the next day. Looks like when I was really tired after all. Though I really didn't feel tired... Haha!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On the 3rd day, God raised me from the dead. XD Joking. But I definitely felt better after sleeping. That day was mostly beach games. Whoo~ And of course, where there's the beach, there are topless guys. Whoo! Of course, I had my feast of eye candies. XD The nicest are those from Robin. All the guys were "nice" enough to walk around without a shirt. ~_^ Sadly, Dark Knights were more... conservative. Though after some games, a few of the guys went topless too. =^^= Sorry. I'm still female. XD

After the beach games, we had our Initation. XD Though, technically, seniors need not participate. But I was curious and I have never been initiated before anyway. So I thought why not? XD It was actually quite funny. Hearing the programmers talk in those funny voices make me smile for no apparent reason. Haha! First, I went down a very slippery slide. And I screamed. XD Hey! I was scared. And I was fast. ^^" And I couldn't see. I was blindfolded.

After that, I had sauce and God-knows-what dumped over me; I crawled through food among other things; and I took a dip in some vegetable-infested pool. All in all, it was a very amusing experience. XD If I got enough shirts to throw, I don't mind going again. XD And I bet all the seniors think I'm nuts. I probably am. =/ Oh well.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The fourth day was mainly Amazing Race and SP night. ^^ Hm... I think everyone was suffering from a lack of sleep... Cause BMS(I) was quite mean on this day... And usually I have an idea if I did something wrong.. But this time... I have none... Zzz... I think... I made some comments... As in... They were just comments... They were not meant to be read in any way and I was just teasing... So... BMS(I), if I offended you in any way during camp, I'm sorry... I really didn't mean to upset you. Zzz... I guess... You seemed moody... (sort of expected... Seeing as you didn't have much sleep or caffeine) and I wanted to try to cheer you up... Only to have it backfire on me I guess... X(

Anyway, the Amazing Race was amazingly tiring. And I was glad it's over. XD Never liked running round for no good reason... Later that night was SP night. XD It was very entertaining, watching those guys and girls walk up; some shy, some very interesting, some fun. Haha! And the most amusing part of the night was that there was two rows of candles to outline some form of a catwalk. However, quite a number of SP pairs keep kicking over the candles! XD Guess they are eyeballing each other too much to notice little glowing bowls below their feet. Hahaha!

And the GLs put up a dance performance as well! Whoo~! For the dance, I agree with BMS(I). BX is super sexy. ~_^ Haha! And for the guys, JW is the funniest! He really look like a chicken flapping its wing! Hahahahaha! The best was the ending, where BMS(E) pulled off a breakdance move. Whoo~! I think it's called the windmill or something like that. XD It is really nice! Though he failed the second time, he did alright for the third one. Haha! Apparently, the GLs did so well, they had a few encores! XD And we went to ADM to celebrate ZQN's birthday. Though we first went to the top of ADM, after a while we went into the building itself as it was quite warm. XD And J thought the pool was the ground and ran into it. XD Oh well... It was dark. And the pool water was very still. Haha! It was still funny though. XD

Then we had some HTHT, and played Shoot, Shag, Marry. But instead of shoot, we had bf/gf. After all, we would all shoot our beloved cockroach (JW). XD Actually, we didn't want to sleep, but in the end, we did. After all, we still had games ahead the next day... Haha! I was so tired, I didn't even realise I placed my glasses on the ground until I couldn't find it... Then CM told me they placed it on the table cause they scared they step on it. ^^" Oops?

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On the last day, I spent the day writing on the cards to the freshies. For once in my life, I actually have things to write about to others. XD Usually, I'm bad with cards cause I have no idea what to write on it. ^^" But this time... I think I wrote the most. ^^" For some of the cards at least. Then we played Street Fighter, which is not very interesting to me, so I shall no go into details. The finale was some water game, which was quite fun. XD The guys tossed Ei and Ev, much like the catch for basket-toss for cheerleading. Except there were a lot more guys tossing. XD Haha! When I saw them I really wished I was the one being tossed as well... Zzz... I guess I miss cheerleading more than I'm willing to admit. =/

And I got drenched as well... Apparently, the freshies decided I was too dry. Not my fault I happen to suck at making friends so no one really bothered to attack me, except SH, who chased me around the field cause I bombed her with water bombs. XD

After that, we changed into whatever we had left, had prize-giving and went home. THANK GOD. I was half-dead from tiredness already. XD When I went home, I literally ate, bathed and slept for about 12 hours straight. ^^" And I didn't even wake up when my parents and my brothers came in. XD Looks like I really was dead tired...

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I'll continue about today some other time... It's past midnight and I'm still tired. AND I HAVE TO WAKE UP EARLY TMR!! ZZZ! Sigh. Night all!

Back to the present?

[YS] Neo gateun saram tto eopseo juwireul dureobwado geujeo georeohdeongeol eodiseo channi
[KH] Neo gatchi joheun saram neo gatchi joheun saram neo gatchi joheun ma eum neo gatchi joheun seonmul

[YS] Neomu dahaeng iya aesseo neorel jikyeojul geu sarami baro naraseo eodiseo channi
[KH]Na gatchi haengbokhan nom na gatchi haengbokhan nom na gatchi unneun geureon choegoro haengbokhan nom

[RW] Neoui ttatteuthan geu soni chagapge, chagapge shikeo isseul ttae
Neoui ganghaetdeon geu ma eumi nal karopge sangcheo badasseul ttae
[DH] Naega jaba julge anajulge salmyeoshi, geugeoseuro jakeun iroman dwendamyeon johgesseo
Eonjena deo maneun geol haejugo shipeun nae mam neon da mollado dwae

[KH] Gaseumi sorichyeo marhae jayuro-un nae yeonghon
Eonjena cheo-eumui imaeum euro neoreul saranghae georeo watdeon shiganboda nameun nari deo manha
[KH/ZM?] Neo gateun saram tto eopseo juwireul dureobwado geujeo georeohdeongeol eodiseo channi

[KH/SM] Neo gatchi joheun saram neo gatchi joheun saram neo gatchi joheun ma eum neo gatchi joheun seonmul
[EH] Neomu dahaeng iya aesseo neorel jikyeojul geu sarami baro naraseo eodiseo channi

[KH/EH] Na gatchi haengbokhan nom na gatchi haengbokhan nom na gatchi unneun geureon choegoro haengbokhan nom
[SW] Naui ganan haetdeon maeumi nunbushige jeomjeom byeonhaegal ttae
Jakeun yokshimdeuri deoneun neomchiji anhge nae mamui geureut keojyeogalttae

[SM] Argo isseo geu modeun iyuneun bunmyeonghi nega isseo ju-eotdaneun geot geu, geot ttak hana ppun
Eonjena gamsahae. Naega mankeum geuri jalhal su iggenni yeah
[LT] Gaseumi sorichyeo marhae jayuro-un nae yeonghon
Eonjena cheo-eumui imaeum euro neoreul saranghae georeo watdeon shiganboda nameun nari deo manha

[RW/YS] Neo gateun saram tto eopseo juwireul dureobwado geujeo georeohdeongeol eodiseo channi
[RW/KH] Neo gatchi joheun saram neo gatchi joheun saram neo gatchi joheun ma eum neo gatchi joheun seonmul

[HC/SM] Neomu dahaeng iya aesseo neorel jikyeojul geu sarami baro naraseo eodiseo channi
[KH] Na gatchi haengbokhan nom na gatchi haengbokhan nom na gatchi unneun geureon choegoro haengbokhan nom

[EH] Itjanha jogeum aju jogeum na sujupjiman neon molla sokeun taeyangboda tteugeoweo nae mam jom arajweo
TV show-e na oneun Girl deureun mudae-eseo bichi nandedo neon eonjena nunbushyeo
([SD] Naega michyeo michyeo Baby)
Saranghandan neoui mare sesangeuk da gajin nan You & I, You’re so fine neo gateun saram isseulkka

[SD] Saranghae oh, negeneun ojik neoppun iran geol babo gateun na-egeneun
([with RW/EH])jeonburaneungeol arajweo
[KH] Gateun gireul georeo wasseo urin seoro dalpagago itjanha nolla-ul ppuniya goma-ul ppuniya saranghal ppuniya

[ALL] Neo gateun saram tto eopseo juwireul dureobwado geujeo georeohdeongeol eodiseo channi
Neo gatchi joheun saram neo gatchi joheun saram neo gatchi joheun ma eum neo gatchi joheun seonmul
Neomu dahaeng iya aesseo neorel jikyeojul geu sarami baro naraseo eodiseo channi
Na gatchi haengbokhan nom na gatchi haengbokhan nom na gatchi unneun geureon choegoro haengbokhan nom

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hm... Actually wanted to post the lyrics of Parachute, but this caught my attention first. XD The MV is really nice. I miss watching Sungmin and Yesung perform. Balloons~! Haha!

Since YX is flying off tonight, I'm dedicating this song to him. XD Find the translation yourself. Just change the "guy" to "girl" and vice versa. XD

OMG. In this MV, Eunhyuk perform topless (or relatively). Whoo~! His body is HOTT!! ♥_♥ It's as nice as BMS(E)'s. XP But Hyukkie's hotter than BMS(E). Because Hyukkie's smile, eyes, and overall charisma is way better than BMS(E). But don't worry! You're still one of my bestest buddies, BMS(E). ~_^

Anyway (as I continue my fangirling), Sungmin is sooo cute with that hairstyle. And so is Ryeowook's. All light and floppy. For some reason, that look looks good on them. They must have some awesome hairstylists. XD And Yesung... Aw... He presented the girl with a hell lot of balloons and gave her one more with a ring... ♥♥♥ He's sooo sweet! Haha! And dear Heechul... He looks so cute with glasses. XD And blonde suits him well... For various reasons. ~_^

Overall, the song itself is also very sweet. ^-^ I love their harmonies. XD And somehow, part of me is glad their over their Techno image. I mean... Songs like Sorry Sorry and Bonamana is nice... But... I prefer them singing these sort of songs better. It brings out all their voices and harmonies. ♥ But sadly, Kangin is in the army now and cannot join them for a while. D8 COME BACK SOON!!!

Back to the present?

Oh wow. I'm super tired... Apparently, my energy is still drained from yesterday... Doesn't help that I'm once more reminded why being a female is BLOODY troublesome. =.=

Zzz. And it's sapping my energy at an exponential rate. Zzz. I wonder how I'm gonna survive camp... >.<

Today's pre-camp briefing was quite interesting. We met some of the freshies for the first time today. The guys are actually quite fun. But the girls... Needs a shove to actually play the games. =.= My dears, this is FOC. Acting all demure and shy gets you nowhere. Not all the girls are frustrating though. There are some really sporting ones. XD They're really nice too. ^-^ And then... There are those that needs some of E's diet... Or whatever she's eating to get that high. XD

But overall, they're really awesome. Though I think most of them are VERY task-oriented. XD Not that that is bad... XP I'm quite task-oriented too. And because of that, our mascot looks really cool!! =^^= We're Dark Knights, so they built a mini batman with a winnie-the-pooh soft toy, and it even has a bat-mobile. Whoo~! And it looks really great. All of us seniors are really impressed. ^-^

Haha! Can't wait to see them again during camp. ^-^ Today's really too tiring to get all that high. But I think... When camp starts, it should be better. Hopefully. XD

For now... I just really REALLY want to sleep... Zzz.........................................

Back to the present?

Do you know what it's like when
You're scared to see yourself?
Do you know what it's like when
You wish you were someone else
Who didn't need your help to get by?

Do you know what it's like
To wanna surrender?

I don't wanna feel like this tomorrow
I don't wanna live like this today
Make me feel better, I wanna feel better
Stay with me here now and never surrender
Never surrender

Do you know what it's like when
You're not who you wanna be?
Do you know what it's like to
Be your own worst enemy
Who sees the things in me I can't hide?

Do you know what it's like
To wanna surrender?

I don't wanna feel like this tomorrow
I don't wanna live like this today
Make me feel better, I wanna feel better
Stay with me here now and never surrender

Make me feel better, you make me feel better
You make me feel better, put me back together

I don't wanna feel like this tomorrow
I don't wanna live like this today
Make me feel better, I need to feel better
Stay with me here now and never surrender

Put me back together
Never surrender, make me feel better
You make me feel better
Stay with me here now and never surrender

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Today is really tiring. XD Woke up at 6 am... Zzz... I think I only got 3 hours of sleep... I could have sworn my brain died on me... XD

But the water park was fun! We went to Jurong Water Park. The weather was kinda 8018... But it seems that 80 was just leaving... XD I think we intruded. >.> Anyway, we basically fooled around with all the different activities there. We lazed round the lazy river, round and round. XD Although I really dislike the pouring of water from above. Zzz. It was COLD. And I'm cold enough, thank you very much.

The slides were the best!! As you slide down, you are blasted with hot air, (apparently the air in the tunnel was much warmer than that outside) and you go round and round and pop out the exit! XD F commented it's like giving birth. O.o Though I doubt we had such an interesting ride before coming out of the womb. XD

The wave pool was quite fun too! We sat on the floats and bobbed up and down when the waves came on. And both F and I were acting like fools, pretending to be pirates braving the storm of the century. XD Haha! The second time the waves came on, instead of the floats, we sat on the ground instead. OMG. The waves were so strong, it lifted Ivan and carried him away. XD Same for me (duh). F insisted on cruising on the float still.

Of course, in between all of these, there were lots of rough-housing with Ivan and F. Ivan dented F's spectacles by hitting her with the float. Of course, that also cause the said specs to fly off her face, causing a spectacle hunting session. XD Ivan also lost his specs in a similar manner. =.= And that sparked specs hunt 3. Specs hunt 2 was when Ivan fell off the float during the slides and as he slowly crawled down the slide, we hunted for his specs. Besides all these hunting, Ivan also capsized my dear float so many times... WITH ME ON IT!!! WTH!!

Hm... I think the only downside to this whole day is... I CAN'T GET ON THE BLOODY FLOAT WITHOUT ASSISTANCE. Thanks Ivan for capsizing me. It took me about 5 minutes to figure out how to jump on the float without flipping it over. =.= And of course... The float never did like me... And I can never quite jump back on the float properly. I think Ivan was extremely amused. =.=

Though I think I'm gonna fall sick soon... The temperature was warm, then cold, then warm, then cold, and warm, and cold, etc. All in the span of about 4 hours. Zzz... I blame the water. XD Oh man... And FOC is just in a few days' time!! And tomorrow is the pre-camp briefing... Zzz. All the way to NTU by 8 am... God save me.

Back to the present?

At the Cross I bow my knee
Where your blood was shed for me
There's no greater love than this
You have overcome the grave
Your glory fills the highest place
What could separate me now

You tore the veil
You made a way
When you said that it is done

You tore the veil
You made a way
When you said that it is done...

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Today was quite ok I guess... I'm still a little nervous about RTC... Zzz... Sigh... There is so many things on my heart... But so far, I only know 2 sources. One is F. Zzz... At the moment, after Ivan revealed some things... I'm getting especially worried for her... But I don't know how to help her... X( I want to... But I have no idea... And it sucks... To want to help but have no idea how. Sigh...

The second source is obvious and I shall not bother about it. XD

Today at cell... We talked about coming back into God's love... Haha! N said it's like floating in a pool of water, face-up that is. And the water is warm and the world is silent and it's a very comforting feeling. I agree. It's like a very tender hug, so soft and loving and warm... And you just want to stay there forever...

Then we talked about blockages... Like that could block us from receiving this love. Also, we talked about surrender. N said we can choose to lay burdens down at God's feet, but we can also choose to pick it back up again. And we are still burdened because we can't let go... XD I think I've been on some tug-of-war with my burdens and with God... As in, I would lay it down, pick it up, lay it down again, pick it up again, etc. So my troubles goes nowhere... Because I can't surrender it... XD Haha... I guess... To really lay it down... And choose to give it to God, and not pick it back up is really hard for me... After all... I'll fret about it and eventually pick it up again... =.= Oops?

I need to work on letting go...

And I need to work on praying too... X( Unlike most Christians... I gave up on prayers long ago... After all... I never seem to hear any answers anyway... But I think... I need to relearn Prayer 101. XD And this time, to learn it properly. Not just a simple request or a simple passing of words... I mean to really sit down, be still and pray... Sounds easy... But it's hell not. To be in that peaceful state of mind, mentally and emotionally, is a pretty tough challenge to me... Especially now... But now... Even more than ever, I need to know how to pray like that. Zzz. Sigh... Sometimes... I hate the fact that I'm alive.

---------------------------------------------

To desire... eh? I wonder... What it is like... to desire something so much it consumes you... And then... To experience that great joy... That fills up your soul and overflows... When it is satisfied... I don't know... Haha. I'm generally rather apathetic when it comes to such things. Zzz. Contentment is both a blessing and a curse... A blessing cause you learn to take pleasure in the simple things and you don't worry or desire, because you have what you want... Yet, it's a curse... Because you stay stagnant... Never moving forward... And in this rat race of the world... I guess it's more of a curse than blessing... Yet... I don't know...

Sigh... Enough of contemplation for today... Tomorrow's gonna be a long day... Night all!

Back to the present?

My dear... Pardon me. I am quite well-known for my blonde/dumb/blur/airhead moments. Under such circumstances, just humour me. What is obvious to you is sometimes NOT obvious to me. Hence, those moments. Yay. I admitted it. XD

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Today is another monotonous day. Spent most of it reading actually. Now, I'm looking for something amusing... Which is not very good... When I want to read happy, funny things, it generally means my moods are heading south. And it ain't supposed to be winter yet. =.=

Ah well... At least the next 2 days will be... more eventful. OMG. I have to swim. In a bikini. Thank you Ivan. For your wonderful suggestion. And now that you've got F to wear it too, there ain't no way you're letting me back down, are you...? =.= Thanks a lot.

ARGH!!! THEN WHAT THE HELL AM I TO DO AFTER THAT?!??!? What DO people do when they hang out...? Zzz... I think I need a lesson in Life(Social) 101 more than I need TCM. XD Zzz... The problem lies with the fact that talking to a wall is easier than talking to F... Most of the time, her answers and replies are so generic I can practically predict them with a 90% accuracy. Sigh... And she doesn't do much to talk about anyway... She's amazingly happy floating around in a little ball of oblivion, staying in the middle of nowhere with little to no opinions, except for siding the minority. Doesn't help that she's almost like my twin, so I pretty much figure out how she is like... And now... Aside from personality, we have almost nothing in common anymore, except for those 4 lovely years we spent together. AT LEAST SHOW AN INTEREST IN SOMETHING!!! Zzz. Sigh... I'll cross that bridge when it comes...

I think... The scariest thing in life is for someone to stop dreaming... And... F seems to be doing that... yet she's blissfully unaware of it...

Back to the present?

When the adults fight... Us kids stay in the background, pray for the battle to be over and just deal with the destruction left over.

Back to the present?

Cat's Paw

This is one nice story about death, life and a little about facades... Actually, it's more like running away. Something I'm very familiar with. Somehow, I could identify myself with Lois. After all, I'm quite a lot like her. A little deluded girl living in a deluded world, seeing all those black lies and being such an idiot.

She wanted out from her lifestyle, and yet, part of her still remains. The part where she constantly depended on Dory, for one. Though there's a certain immaturity about her... The part where she was blind to her father... I'm not blind... I know my dad loves me. But his actions... Sometimes they show it, sometimes they don't. And I guess my brothers and I all learnt to tune him out after a while. XD And I thought it was just me... Then I learnt that Sam does too. Except he's more discreet than me. =.= Thanks bro.

Also... If I were to ever run from my home... I would have considered all the thoughts of working, living, etc. already... No point running away if you have to end up running back anyway. And true... I've considered them before... Yes, my dad can be that much of an ass, but deep inside, I know I can't. My family means too much to me to leave them. So if I have to put up with an overbearing father, so be it.

Thank God when my brothers go to the army, I'll be away in China. God knows what will happen if I have to deal with him without them around. I'd probably lose my head. XD

Oh yeah, this is a shoutout to my dear Inume:

Don't give up! Don't give in! I know you can do it! So ganbatte!! We can go out or fangirl over DGM or marathon LOTR after the exams so hang in there!! The storm will fade eventually and then you'll be right as rain again. ^-^

Back to the present?

Zzz... After my exciting week last week, coming back to my room and snoozing the whole day... Somehow feels very dull...

Much like the weather today. It seems 18 is being too protective of 27 that I can't even see him. Heck, even 80 came to visit. What the hell? Is today the gathering of the guardians or something...? O.o

The summary of today: I AM VERY BORED.

Though I think by next week, I'd have enough excitement to last me the month. XD But that's in the future, and I'm still in the present.

I'm still surfing for epic war scenes to read about, though there isn't much on them. =.= Usually, the romance in those stupid stories outweigh the war scenes. And I've yet to find many talented people that can write war scenes really well. The ones that are good... Are really good. They can bring across the sense of chaos in the battlefield. Plus all those political wars and back-stabbing and betrayals and suspense... Whoo~ Those are the stories that I'll never forget. They'll take you on one hell of an emotional roller-coaster as you cruise along with the main characters on their journeys.

Ack... I know I shouldn't be reading such stories anyway... I usually get sucked in too deep and my mood begins to follow that of the story. XD Now that's not just bi-polar but it gives a hell lot of mood swings.

Sigh... Have to study chinese... SIGH. INUME!!! FINISH YOUR EXAMS FAST!!! THEN CAN WATCH DRRR TOGETHER!! I WANT TO SEE THE HEADLESS BIKER!!!

Back to the present?

You are here, in our midst
How we've waited for moments like this
Have your way in this place
Holy Spirit come do as you wish
We are changed as You move in our midst

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BMS(I):

You aren't ready yet. Hm... Actually, the best analogy I can think of for Christianity is that Christianity is like some unknown brand of tea. You can hear about it from others, or get introduced by friends, or you may see it yourself. And some people can even buy this tea themselves. But unless they taste it, unless they experience the tea itself, only then can those people say that God is good.

You... are not quite ready to buy this tea, much less drink it. One day you may, one day you may not. I have no idea. I can't quite predict the future. But Christianity is something you need to experience it for yourself before you can decide what it is like. I don't know about the other religions though... ^^" I've only been in one type all my life. XD

So... Keep questioning, if you have the mental capacity to do so. XD One day, you may find the answers you are looking for. ~_^

------------------------------------------------------------------

These few days have been quite chaotic. XD First was cell. It was really nice. And I think the cell is moving towards intervening for people, standing in the gap and all. As for me... I'm just really excited about the cell RTC. Maybe it's because I'm the programming IC (Whoo~) and call it a gut feeling, but I think the cell RTC is gonna be one heck of a night. ^-^ Planning's in progress, we eventually got somewhere by Friday night (or should I say Saturday morning. XD) Though the focus now is on area RTC, since it's on 17 July. OMG! It's right after FOC. I'm gonna be sooo dead!!! XDDD Oh well.. =/

On Friday itself, I DROVE. Whoo~! Long time since I've last driven. XD Anyway, I am SUPER happy to say I am DAMN proud of my brothers. Especially on Friday. Seeing Zack on stage, with that silly expression on his face, I am very proud of him... At first, it was Sam. Now, Zack.

Dear God,
Please let me be that support for these two heroes in my life. I want to see them fly high and far. And I want to see them touch those dreams of theirs. Whatever it takes, let me be that support...

In Jesus' Name
Amen

Saturday was tiring and enriching in so many ways. BMS(I) and I went for a walk round the Treetop Walk at MacRichie (sp?). The bridge was bouncy!! XD That was kinda scary... But we saw lots of really cool stuffs. WE SAW A WHOLE BUNCH OF MONKEYS!!! SO CUTE~~!!! Sadly, it wasn't flowering season yet, so we didn't see much of the fruits there or any flowers for that matter. Also, since it just rained, the place was muddy. D8 Awww... But for all the walks in the mud, it was worth to see nature at the top of the world (or at least, it felt like the top of the world for me =D). Anyway, we saw many interesting types of trees. Although I'm not a flora person, I have to admit, nature does have some weird ways of looking after itself. XD Hahaha!

Saturday night was one hell of a night. People were dropping like flies, no pun intended. As the people were being prayed for, they fell, they wept, they vomitted, they fainted, they cried out loud. And they were all smiling. I dared not step forward to be prayed... I guess I am still afraid... Giving up control is one very VERY difficult thing to me... And I'm also afraid of my own reaction to it. Will I float? Will I fall? What will I feel? ... I think I'm most afraid of the last question... I hate not knowing... I want to know... Yet... I'm afraid of what I will know... What I would learn... And I guess it's this uncertainty that scares me more than any zombie ever will...

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Today, I went COSFEST 2010!! YAHOO~!!! With Inume ♥. J was there too. And I bought a hell lot of KHR keychains. >.> Not my fault they are so freaking adorable... HibaHibaHiba.

I think SG's cosplayers are getting to be more daring. I swear some of them showed off their bra or bodies. ~_^ They have nice bods though... Not the bodybuilder sort, but the soft, edible sort... ♥ Especially the girls there. Whoo~ The guys... Well... There are more guys cosplaying now, and some are also more ambitious to dress up as girls. XD Though I think the more amazing ones are those that dare to go around almost topless, like when cosplaying Blue Rad Grad or Luffy from One Piece. However... They still lack that sexy athletically slim build of those characters. Most are too thin... XD Didn't look at them much though... The girls are way sexier to look at. XD Didn't take any pictures though... XD I'm gonna try to keep this blog PG-13 thank you very much.

Though I wonder... What if I cosplay BRS for EOY Cosplay Event...??? OMG. That one hell of an idea... But I think I would need some alcohol to down before I go there... O.o It is one... skimpy outfit... For the lack of better words. XD Oh manz... I'm thinking more like a guy nowadays. >.<

Haha! That reminds me... BMS(I) says I'll be better understood if I look for a boyfriend 3-4 years my senior. XD The problem? I don't know anyone of that age, much less talk to them. XDDD Guys my age are too much of idiots for me to even consider them... I can't even talk to them... Zzz... Note to self: Work on talking. Especially to guys. XD Girls are simple. Or at least... Simpler to me... =/ Except when they start to gossip about guys or bitch about others. Then it's just pure irritating. Hm... I guess the reason why BMS(I) never quite come across as bitchy to me is because I'm not irritated by his talking. XD Odd reason, I know.

Anyway, I could have sworn this week just flew by. O.o AND I HAVE YET TO TOUCH CHINESE. I am screwed. Zzz.

Back to the present?

How I love you Jesus
Lord I live to worship you
I live each day to honour you
With all that I have

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Amazing Races, anyone? XD

Back to the present?